Where I'm at Now: Authenticity in the Moment

I haven't blogged in awhile. I don't write that to apologize, or to try and appease my seven followers. In fact, I know from reading all my blogging-blogger friends that I should never apologize for gaps in publishing. That being said, I am at a point where I can look at my journey and feel good about where I'm at. For any of you who read my career exploration posts during the last year (University of Me, and Straddling the Introvert-Extrovert Line), you know that I began my exploration into the L&P field last year. I meandered through eLearning and Instructional Design, facilitation vs. development, and a crazy foray into an unsuccessful Flash class.  All of sudden, in July, I knew something felt off. Instead of forcing  myself to find a job in eLearning or Instructional Design, I backed off and attempted to let my inner self figure it all out. During that quiet transition, I wrote the post, Listening to Myself, then I withdrew from the blogging and Twitter world.  I felt sort of inauthentic and strange that the eLearning person whom people had come to know wanted to pursue a different direction.

I realized that the entire time, I had wanted to focus on organizations as a whole. It is what I love, and what I do best. And yet I was terrified to admit this. Every OD person who I'd encountered seemed to have an MBA, and I knew this would be a crappy fit for my energy-empathy-compassionate-non-finance-thinkin' self. So instead of trying to figure out how to be an OD person without an MBA, I moved on to the things that I felt I could do without going back to school. My education degree would help me get into ID, while my library degree had offered enough technology experience that I could fake things. 

But in July, I hit a wall, and I realized that I don't mind doing ID or eLearning, but I like it because of the context of developing organizations and making them better. 
Once I embraced my joy for this, I stopped trying to put myself in a box, and instead I got inspired to go back to school and become even better. I'm in love with my current program and my inspirational classmates. I'm learning that I can always open a new door, and that branding myself once doesn't mean that I'm stuck with that definition forever. 

Just Undo It: The Control-Z Generation

Forget Gen Y or the Millennials--anyone who has grown up with a computer, I like to call the  Control-Z Generation. 
And I am jealous of how they learn.
At (almost) 39 years old, I am on the cusp of the "computer comfortability" level. A Mac Classic arrived in our home when I was in high school, but most of my technology memories were based on learning how to type on an electric typewriter. I remember filling out applications on my parent's Smith Corona while praying we had enough correction tape to fix any errors. Making a mistake meant cautiously backspacing the carriage while hoping the correction tape was lined up properly. Accuracy was valued over speed and because mistakes were difficult to correct, I was especially timid to try new formatting or design. 
Now going back to the Control-Z generation, I think one of the reasons they are so tech savvy is because they are not as worried about messing up. Who cares if they do? They can just time travel backwards to undo their actions. By eliminating the stigma of making mistakes, interactive (e)learning is more powerful than ever. I am trying to learn from their confidence, but I think a small part of me will always wonder if we have enough correction tape in the house.  

Wow, What a Difference Training Makes!

The other day, I wrote a post about Twitter for Professional Development. Along with the post, I uploaded a screencast that I had made. Very shortly after I uploaded it, I took down the link. I decided that I wasn't satisfied with the final product, and I needed help quite desperately. 
I took matters into my own hands, and signed up for the free imovie and Garageband classes at the Apple store. (I blogged about that too). Well, here I am, three days after the training, and I feel like I have a totally different video. It is clean, fasted-paced, and fun. It is not necessarily a "training" video, but it is a good introduction for someone who is interested in getting a fast-paced overview of twitter. There are still some things I'd like to fix about it, but I think it might mean using a different screencasting tool. 
I'd say that training works, but you be the judge: 


And my original video below: 

Learning to Edit

Sometimes, I am my own worst critic. I just watched my last video tutorial and said, "The timing isn't quite right. I need to refine it."
I know in this day and age, perfect doesn't always matter, but with training, I think many videos are too long. My "Twitter for Professional Development" video fell into that category. 
Learning new technologies is sometimes about giving it a go, and deciding that you need a little more training. Screencasting and making video tutorials are like that for me. I started using them about two years ago, but had always worked in a team environment to produce the final content. This time, I am on my own. I have decided to take a class at the Apple store to learn how to better use imovie software. I thought I would have to pay for the workshop, but it turns out that the class is free. I don't mean to tout Apple products, but imovie lives on my computer already, so if I can learn a bit more, the quality of my videos will improve. Taking time to do it right is worth it--especially if it builds a stronger foundation for future projects. 

Don't Forget What Assuming Does...

Sometimes it's good to be honest about current challenges. As much as it hurts to admit, we often learn the most from situations that are the most difficult at the time.
This week, my dog and I are having a communication breakdown. She has had minor surgery and is wearing an elizabethan collar to prevent her from scratching the injury. Although she practiced wearing the e-collar before the surgery (yes, we did!), I failed to consider that her "tunnel vision" would greatly affect how we interacted during her walks.
Her regular breaks have now become exercises in fixation. Her limited vision is now the cause of a telescope-like focus on all sorts of delicious trash. Because of this unrelenting interest, my "leave it" commands have little impact on her obsession, and instead, I have been pulled around like a carriage behind the Headless Horseman.

I said, "Come!"

I am not always the bluntest communicator. I don't like to hurt people's feelings, and that sometimes creates a battle between diplomacy and direction.

As I have gotten older, I have realized where the problem lies: clear, concise communication is sometimes seen as potentially masculine or overbearing. As a result, many times females downplay their requests. Unfortunately, meek or wishy-washy attempts to explain oneself do not result in effective directives. 

Even though I have seen this phenomenon, I have also worked with some powerful, direct, innovative females. Through them, I have begun learning how to channel some of my inner badarse (i.e., my ability to be a direct communicator). But lately, these lessons are sometimes best taught by my dog.